OK TIME FOR SOME FUN!!!!

FIFTY YEARS IN THE FUTURE:

A guitarist dies and is quite please to find that he ends up standing before the pearly gates of Guitar Heaven. St. Peter shows him in, and gives him a guided tour.

“This is Stevie Ray’s room here…” says Peter, and the guitarist is saying “Wow! Stevie Ray!”
“And this is Jimi’s room…” and the guitarist is totally over the moon.

Finally Peter shows the guitarist to his own room. Before Peter leaves, he says to him, “I have to ask. Is Yngwie here?” Peter shakes his head sadly and says “I’m afraid he went… the “other” way…”

The guitarist is disappointed but goes to his room and tries to get some sleep. He is woken up in the middle of the night by someone playing a really fast harmonic minor lick – and it sounds just like Yngwie. He presses his ear to the wall, and listens more closely. Someone in the next room is playing really fast neo-classical shreds through what sounds very much like a vintage Strat. The guitarist is confused as it sounds so much like Yngwie. The next day he tells Peter that he is almost certain that Yngwie’s in the next room.

Peter pulls him to one side, and whispers into his ear, “Shhh…. don’t tell anyone. That’s God. He thinks he’s Yngwie Malmsteen“

Q - What do a cup of coffee and Eric Clapton have in common?
A - They both suck without Cream

Q -  What's the difference between a guitarist and a mutual fund?
A - One matures.

Q - What do you call a guitar player without a girlfriend?
A - Homeless.

Q - Why did the drummer join the band?
A - He wanted to hang out with musicians.

Q - How does a guitar player change a light bulb?
A - He lies on the bed so that the room is spinning around it.

Q - How does a guitar player show up for practice?
A - Drunk and late......... as usual

Q - How many guitar players does it take to cover a Stevie Ray Vaughan tune ?
A - Evidently all of them.

Q - How do you get a rhythm guitarist to play softer?
A - Give him music to read.

Q - What's the difference between a guitar and a tuna fish?
A - You can tune a guitar but you can't tuna fish.

Q - What is the definition of a minor second?
A - Two lead guitarists playing in unision.

Q - How do you make a lead guitarist slow down?
A - Put some sheet music in front of him.

Q - How do you make a guitarist play quieter?
A - Put a sheet of music in front of him.

Q - How do you make him stop?
A - Put notes on it.

Q - How many guitarists does it take to change a light-bulb?
A - Twenty. One to change the bulb and nineteen to say
    "Not bad, but I could've done better."

Q - What do you throw a drowning guitarist ?
A - His amplifier.

Q - What do you call two guitarists playing in unison?
A - Counterpoint.

Q - What did the guitar say to the guitarist?
A - Pick on someone your own size!

Q - How do you make a guitarist's eyes light up? A - Shine a flashlight in his ear. Q - What's the range of a Gibson Les Paul? A - Depends on how far you throw it. Q - Why are so many guitarists jokes one liners? A - So the rest of the band can understand them. Q - What's the difference between a guitar player and a bag of garbage? A - The garbage gets taken out at least once a week. Q - What's black and blue and laying in a ditch? A - A guitarist who's told too many drummer jokes. Q - How many guitarists does it take to change a light bulb? A - At least 2000: one to change the bulb and 1999 to insist how much better they could've done it!

Today is the Birthday of one of my FAVORITE rock riff-masters of

 all time:

Jimmy Page!

Guitarist for the Mighty Led Zepplin.

Here is a cool site showing some of the songs Jimmy played on

 Here.

Keep Drivin Jimmy!!

Michael Lee

Warning: Long post – procede at your own RISK. You have been warned!

Hello Friends!!

I tell you what…. I have been playing guitar and jamming guitar solos for over 25 yrs and I STILL just got an education – IT NEVER ENDS!!!

No matter how long or how short you have been playing… there is always something more to learn and I think that is part of the AWESOMENESS of playing music – especially playing the BEST and most expressive instrument on the planet – THE GUITAR!!!

You see friends, I am not a techno or gear geek by any stretch of the imagination. I have absolutely no interest in the latest gadget, how amps work, what wood sounds like what, blah, blah, blah…..

NONE. ZERO. NADA.

Hell, I don’t even give a crap what a guitar looks like!!!! I work on function not on appearance.

I think I got this from reading interviews from Eddie Van Halen. You ever seen this dudes main axe in the 70′s – early 90′s?!?!? A Piece of Shit! But that piece of shit guitar was responsible for changing the direction and definition of rock guitar solos…. damn, for that part even R & B guitar solos – listen to R & B guitar solos pre and post Michael Jackson‘s Beat It…. next thing you know there are wild finger tapped solos all over the charts in ALL types of music.

So, that was my philosophy – as long as it sounded good… it was good!

Therefore, I just found a guitar that felt right and plugged into an amp that sounded right. I had NO idea what made these things sound the way they did I just knew they sounded good.

I recently got back together with some old band mates… and these dudes kick ass for sure!! Now in the past I have owned a Marshall JCM 900 100 WATT half stack like this one:

It was a great amp but the problem was IT WAS TOO LOUD!! The only way I could get a great sound was either to use a distortion pedal or rack, which to me defeats the purpose of having a tube Marshall amp or to crank that mutha up to 20!!!

So, I got a new Marshall and have been using that for the last…. what….. 15 or more years and it has served me well. Here is what I used a Marshall 8240 Stereo Chorus Valvestate

I found a way to get a great sound out of this amp and have been very happy with it.

Until Now…..

The 8240 can get a lot of different sounds but there are BIG drawbacks with this amp such as a sucky effects loop – another thing I know LITTLE about but needed to learn because you can’t use a volume pedal with this amp and keep full tone (the fix? run an adjustable eq through the effects loop and use the level to kick up the volume for solos. Not a great fix but a fix that worked well enough).

Also, I wanted to kick up my sound a little to improve the fullness of the band since we were a 3 piece. So I started looking for a new half stack – but this time a 50 watter so I can get a killer tone but at less volume (I only know this because I ran into a band practice way back when and the dude was using my old JCM 900 but the 50 watt version and this sounded bad ass!).

Now, being a HUGE Van Halen fan and also a sucker for propoganda I started to check out the new 5150 III 50 watt head like this one:

PROBLEM: NOBODY HAS THE FREAKIN HEAD FOR ME TO

TRY!!!!

No worries, being the sucker and an Eddie fan… I said “F-It” and bought it site/sound unknown (just what I got from Youtube vids).

I fugured if this dude has had the most sought after tone in all of rock (the “Brown” sound) then why not go with the originator of said tone?

Ok…. now I need a cabinet and THIS, my friends, is where the

 education came in.

Since I used to have that old JCM 900 1960A Slant Cabinet and thought I remembered that it sounded pretty damn good… I think…. I decided to get another one to go with the new head. Sounds logical right?

Also, I remembered that the 1960A had a feature that let you have a stereo sound – which I LOVE! Split the left and right side of the cabinet for a HUGE sound. So I got the 1960A Cab…. no brainer, right?!?!

Well…. then I started talking to other musicians, the dudes from EVH gear, and checking out various forums and they gave me a nice little education.

You see, it seems that the key to a cabinet (and a combo for that matter) may be less about the cabinet (or combo) as it is about the speakers!

DUH!!!!

Turns out the speakers you use have a HUGE influence on the sound and may make or break a cabinet or combo. You can check out what I mean by listening to the different sounds on the Celstion site: http://professional.celestion.com/guitar/features/tone/index.asp 

So Turns out that my 1960A has the same exact speakers as my 8240 combo – Turn away if techno stuff makes you sick -  the speakers are G12T-75′s

These speakers, according to Celestion, have scooped out mids and give that 80′s metal sound. This is COOL but can also be a little harsh on the ears at higher volumes and they can sound thin and cause you to add more mids on the amp (something I did naturally for sound not knowing the reason why was due to the speakers I had!!!).

So I did more research into speakers…..

I found out that the new 5150 III has speakers custom made for Van Halen – but are pretty much a copy of the Celestion Greenbacks. The Celestion WHAT?!?!?!

More research….

Ok… so these Greenbacks are highly coveted and the originals hard to get… thus…. expensive. They, according to Celstion, also are warmer sounding and more punchy since the mids are intact.

So, what to do?

Keep the 1960A or get something with these Greenback dealios?

                                                                   OR

Buy some Greenbacks and put them in the 1960A?

More education……Thank you internet forums!!!

Because the 1960A is slanted the cabinet has less mass/volume for the speakers and this gives even more highs AND since 2 of the 4 speakers are directed right at your face – WATCH OUT!!!

Ok, so changing speakers in the 1960A won’t do what I need. Now what?

More education….Thank you internet forums!!!

Speakers tend to change tone the more they are used. So just buying a Greenback will not necessarily give you the Oh My God I Have To Have It “Brown” sound. Seems the 5150 III cabinet speakers have a “worn-in” speakers.

OK……

Also, the 5150 III cab wood and interior are made custom demensions for a certain tone and resonance – I KNOW!!! More education to get that info!!

You see my 8240 has an open back and one of my old Marshall Cabs had an open back and the 1960A has a closed back. Now I get that the close back would give more bass in the sound but NEVER gathered that the dimensions would also play a big part – like the smaller dimensions due to the slanted cabinet giving more high end.

This was gettting more complicated than I thought!!

BUT, if I wanted “THAT” sound then I better get “THAT” cabinet….

 the search was on….

5150 III cabs come in 1 x 12 (1 12″ speaker), 2 x 12, and 4 x 12.

I didn’t want another combo situation sound and wanted a fuller sound so I opted for the 4 x 12.

NOW please don’t get me wrong…. those G12T-75′s are GREAT sounding speakers and sound AWESOME with the Marshall JCM 800 or 900 heads – REALLY GOOD!!!!

But I was looking for something different – a new sound for me.

The point here is that after playing ALL these years…. there is a TON of stuff to learn and that, my friends, is what keeps it interesting and a freakin awesome never ending quest of “AH HA” moments.

I will finish with one of my favorite quotes that seems appropriate for the “Ah Ha” stuff…..

“Life is not measured by the # of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away..”

                                                                - ANONYMOUS

LESSON: NEVER STOP LEARNING OR YOU WILL MISS THOSE

 MOMENTS!!!

KEEP ROCKIN

MICHAEL LEE